14.4.10

ABC

Fine, I couldn't do it. Dash all my finals! If I perish, I perish.

This morning as I was shaving my legs to insane smoothness and making my hair smell good (pity I don't have a boyfriend), I began to wonder what it means to be an American-Born Chinese (ABC).

It all started with the concept of trying not to stare. You know, like staring at blacks, Samoans, extremely short/tall people, extremely short people holding hands with extremely tall people, amputees... I feel like an intolerant racist because I want to look, but I have this fear that they'll sick their fellow limbless, black, Samoan midgets on me when I've ogled past the 3rd second. But then, of course, how do they know the average time I look at the Caucasian passerby?

So what if I cause this dilemma for others? So nothing.

The thing most people probably wouldn't realize is that I'm quite white inside. It's just my outside that's yellow.

lilsis: I'm yellow.
me: Me too.
lilsis: No you're not. You're brown.

And I continue.
What does it mean to be ABC?

-Sometimes, especially in the elementary ages, it is easy to forget what we look like.

-It is quite impossible to call a leader/teacher/family friend by their first name.
Hello, Mr./Ms./Sister/Mrs./Dr./Brother ______.
Oh haha, just call me (insert first name here).
*physically incapable of doing so* Uhh. ok?

-Behold the Chinese club meeting:
Greeter: 你好!歡迎你。這是你的小提琴嗎?你要表演給我們聽嗎?
=]
~just walk away~

-It's not called a "switch," "branch," "spanker," or whatever. It's "the hand of love."

-Almost everything green and edible is known as 菜 (pronounced tsai). I didn't know what the dreaded "spinach" was until 4th grade. That is, after I decided I like it.

-Dessert = fruit tray (with at least five fruits).

-Dessert = raw tomato.

-Every other Asian of the opposite sex is a potential mate. (You know it, and they know that you know it, and you know that they know that you know it.) Yeah, NOT awkward.

-Conversations often start like this.
So where are you from?
Provo.
....
...
..
.
And uh what about your progenitors/ancestors/lineage/heritage?
My parents both come from Taiwan, but I was born and raised here. (I kid you not, ask me, and this is the word-for-word response)

- or this.
Can you speak Chinese?
No. I look like I can, but I can't.
or
一點點。

-And my favorite - our studious cousins from across the pond think we're rockin' awesome.

So thus.

~See? Just walkin' the beach -- make any sense now? No? *sigh*~

1 comment:

  1. This made my day. Just what I needed during finals week. And if I'm being insensitive saying that, please don't sick your midget friends on me...:P

    ReplyDelete

Man? False.
Bat? False.
Bananana? Clearly.

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